Relationships

I wrote this blog almost 2 years ago...Let's see if my thoughts or desires have changed. As usual, I will try to be as vague to protect the guilty! lol   

Relationships are sometimes complicated yes, I still believe this and it goes for ALL relationships-if we make them that way. Call me simple but I believe that things in life shouldn't be so difficult, especially relationships True. I admit, I haven't always had good relationships but as I've matured, I have learned to give more than I take. This giving more than taking is a hard concept for some to accept or even recognize within themselves. It is rare when I meet someone that is selfless and gives to others without expecting anything in return. Even kids now-a-days will always ask what's in it for them as if everything in life has to give you something in return. I am "officially" feeling that I want to be in a relationship I have "officially" been in a relationship. I haven't met anyone yet nor am I desperately seeking someone but I am at a point where I think I can let my guard down just a little to see if I can give it another shot Yes, that guy came along and I gave it a shot or should I shoot him?. I've met many but none have been able to fill the shoes that were left behind Still agree with this although I have let go in so many ways. I find myself making excuses as to why I am not ready, why it would never work out or how I don't think there is anyone out there for me. I think I am scared. I KNOW I am scared. The thought of being in a relationship again is intimidating!! What if it's not right? What if I fall in love? What if I am hurt again? Woah! so much to think about!!!  Taking a risk is always scary but if I never would have taken it, I would not have these experiences under my belt.Why can't it be simple? My current relationship has not been easy and I have been working on it all this time. I over think so much that my brain goes into overdrive I give it my all before I jump ship. Love should be natural and although there are people in my life that I can so easily fall in love with, I know it is not the right time for them. Instead of being a clingy, needy woman, I choose to keep my distance. I'm still not clingy though I do like doing things with my significant other and I realize how important it is to have something in common.

I have conversations with my close friends and we come to the same conclusion... We feel like damaged goods (even if we know we are not) and we know that we are strong women that want to be taken care of emotionally. Yes, strong yet docile and tender. This convo continues although it reads like we are not confident, we very much know our value.

Does this so desired man excist? If you know him send him my way just warn him that getting to know me comes with a side effect... To know me is to love me! lol! He does, he does but his way of loving is really not what I expected. Go figure, it never goes the way I dream. It's God's way of helping me deal with wanting to control everything

*Let my love vibes shoot up into the universe and let whoever catches them be prepared to receive all the love and passion inside of me *wink*wink
*Let my love vibes shoot up into the universe and let whoever catches them be prepared to receive all the love and passion inside of me *wink*wink